I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize