Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize