i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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