ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there were birth control emojis
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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