I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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