some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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