hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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