I cockslap morals
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
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your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I still have a little drunk in my system
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize