Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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