My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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