just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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