we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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