ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
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I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
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Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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