I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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