It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
It's just like the Real World with babies
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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