You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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