If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize