If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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