took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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