Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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