The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize