So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
BRING THE BAGELS
Randomize