End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize