pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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