Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
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i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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