3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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