have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
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Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
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Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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