Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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