He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
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Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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