I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Boobs are out for the taking
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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