i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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