im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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