the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize