I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
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of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
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He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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