maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize