Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize