ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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