put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
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