so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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