One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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