I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
We have so much sex to catch up on
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize