Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize