I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have post one night stand depression
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