you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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