He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
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don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
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Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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