If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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