i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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