After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize