I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize