These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize